RULE NUMBER 1: DON'T BE!
The dangerous downsides of Perfectionism
Trying to reach the unreachable is making us unhappy. Do you think it’s possible to be always this picture perfect human being, always so calm with perfect manners and behaviour everyday? No, it’s not.
What is wrong with wanting to deliver perfect work, with wanting to be flawless at everything we do? My short answer is: a lot. Perfectionism and fear of failure are so closely related. And I am not gonna lie to you - you can’t be always perfectly elegant. We are emotionally human beings and there are some situations where can’t always look and behave perfectly.
You don’t have to be perfect, you can be good
Life is stressful. We have to keep up with work, school, friends, and family, not to mention washing dishes, cleaning the house, and cooking meals. Every day, we face so much pressure from outside influences. We let ourselves believe that if we just achieve a certain look or a certain lifestyle, we will somehow be happier, more accepted by friends, and more loved by others.
Perfection doesn’t matter. You won’t always fit into your favorite jeans, land your dream job, find the love of your life or feel elegant everyday. And all of that is okay. Sometimes, it’s okay to just be good.
1) Don’t compare yourself to others!
It’s very hard not to compare your life’s script with others and this alone makes you question a lot of things if you find that someone is somewhat better than you.
Stop comparing yourselves to the people you see on social media because you don’t know what they do offline. You don’t know half the things they have to put up with before they come online and chances are you may be living a better life than they are but because you’ve allowed yourself to be compared to them, this has left you sad.
2) Perfect won’t make you happier
Stop searching for perfection in what you don’t have. Fitting into those jeans, driving a better car, buying a new house… These things will not make you happier. Why? Because once you have them, you’ll want more. There will always be something else in your life that isn’t quite perfect. Something more to work on or to improve. Achieving these social expectations is not evidence of your self-worth.
3) Learn to let go
Try to let go of whatever it is that’s holding you back from accepting who you are. You’ll probably realize that you aren’t what other people say you are. You aren’t your pain, your past, or your emotions. It’s usually negative ideas about ourselves and hurtful self-talk that get in the way of who we really want to be and push us to never make any mistakes.
4) Make peace with the “now” before you feel satisfied with the “later”
We can’t feel totally satisfied with where we’re going until we can accept, acknowledge, and appreciate where we are. Make peace with where you are, and your journey toward something new will feel much more peaceful, rewarding, and satisfying.
"We're just human beings. In the end, you do your job. I do my job in the best way I can." - Mohamed Salah